Wednesday, May 6, 2015

Happy Birthday Violet

I thought I would start to lay down some things you need to know.  I know, I know, I'm going to live to be 135... but that being so... Anyway, the one advantages of having an old mom is that she knows things, more things than a young and pretty mom.  And I know we talk all the time about all kinds of stuff, but you guys are Digital Natives and maybe someday you'll want something to look back on, to search through for that thing I said once about that thing we were talking about.

So, Happy Birthday! My, now 11 year old, girlie!

Wow, can it be so?  Time does indeed go fast, and life is long, etc. etc.  But what I want to talk about today is you.

Now that you are entering the tween stage there is one most important thing you should know.

Love yourself.

I know this is important because I, myself, have not always loved myself and it has led to some really hard lessons I would rather have avoided.

Protect this love you have for yourself at all costs.  Look, its coming, you and I both know boys will get cuter and cuter and your heart will flutter when you see them, and although a discussion about boys will come some day soon, what is important here and now to know is that you should feel as strongly about your own self as you do about anyone else.  No one on this earth is worth sacrificing your own self worth (including and especially your mother!). 

So, while this may sound esoteric now I just want you to repeat after me, over and over, "I love myself".  This love for self is where all good things in life spring from.  When you make love for yourself the most important thing then somehow every decision you are ever faced with seems clearer.  Not easier, clearer.  There will be hard decisions for sure.  But knowing what is the right thing for you is always easier when you have a healthy portion of self love every day.

And this doesn't mean selfish either. Ironically, the more you love and support your own self and life, the easier it is to give of yourself.

Right now, I know you think you love me more than you love yourself, and I am the most important person in the world to you, but I honestly look forward to the day when you can say YOU are the most important person to you.  And I will cherish the memory of how much you love me now.
And Angus, this goes for you too young man!

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